“Throw it in the lake.” he said “That’s it. We’ll have to throw it in the lake.” Jeff was relieved and energized by the solution. It was so simple. The lake was the perfect place to get rid of the evidence. The bag would sink to the bottom and everyone knew that it was deep, really deep, so the chance of it ever being found was almost nil. Sorted. Job done.
Dave was not so sure. It sounded too easy. If chucking a bag of tools in a lake was the answer then why had they wasted a whole evening, eight pints, three bags of cheese and onion crisps and a bowl of nuts trying to think of the best way to get rid of the stuff. Dave was blessed with a
melodramatic imagination and was trying to decide if ‘throwing it in the lake’ was like Frodo’s journey to Mount Doom to throw the ring away or an echo of the King Arthur stories. The first nearly killed the hero and second saw the bag, ok sword, being caught by some watery tart. Not good. Really, not good.
“So we bury it instead.” Jeff remained enthusiastic. “If we bury it in a graveyard no one will think to look there and newly dug earth doesn’t attract attention.” Dave thought zombies might be an issue.
“How about one of those scrap metal yards? Crush it in a car.” Dave had seen too many CSI and Silent Witness episodes to be happy with that.
“Car boot sale? eBay? We move it on anonymously” Apparently cyber-literate police could track anyone these days, according to Dave. Although Jeff first heard semi-literate not cyber-literate which confused him for a second.
“Melt it down?” No way. Dave thought he’d seen molecular forensics on Sherlock. “Ok….another pint?”